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July 31, 2005
Where You Stay At?
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
Where do you live? If you live in the United States, what state do you live in? If you live outside the states, what country do you currently call home? This site has received thousands and thousands of visitors and I'd like to take an informal survey to see where you are when you visit the Quixtar BLOG. I'm from Tennessee in the United States. How about you?
Just leave a comment with your location. Please, no specific addresses. Your country or state is fine.
This Site Needs...
By QBlog in Humor
More Cowbell.
July 30, 2005
- Do Not Join Quixtar
By QBlog in Quixtar Chatter
- Do Not Join Quixtar
"Just watch out for these people, that's all I'm saying"
Sales Goal missed by 98.9%
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
Scott Larsen's the king of Amway and Quixtar parody. His latest effort, Quixtar Exec Axed for Missing Sales Goal - Sales Goal missed by 98.9% is both hilarious and poignant.
According to an anonymous source inside Quixtar the reason for Ken McDonald's sudden "retirement" from the top position was that he could not make good on his goal to have Quixtar sales at $100 billion in just 5 years. Even after five years of business Quixtar sold just $1.1 billion, falling short of the $100,000,000,000.00 goal by $98,900,000,000. 00 To make things worse, Quixtar still has not exceeded the 1997 peek sales of the North American Amway operation, which Quxitar replaced.
Be sure to listen to the audio clips and compare them to what your favorite Diamond is saying Quixtar will be earning five years from now.
July 29, 2005
QBlog's Farcical Help Desk - 31
By QBlog in Farcical Help Desk
Every Friday, the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™ answers the Quixtar questions that nobody dared to ask. Additionally, each Help Desk answer is guaranteed to end with some form of punctuation or we'll refund your money. No fooling!
Question: Hey, did you hear about that new multi-blogging
software that posts stuff to thousands of blogs?
Answer: I'm not sure. What's it called?
Q: It's called Blog-Mothra and it's supposed to revolutionize
the way you blog.
A: Interesting. So it could help people with their Quixtar business then?
Q: Absolutely. It allows you to customize your message
to thousands of people with a fraction of the effort it would have taken to
do it manually.
A: How much does it cost?
Q: Not much really. See, the great thing is that you
make money from it. Each blog has Google Ads and when someone clicks them, you
get paid. The more blogs you have, the more you get paid! It's that easy.
A: I dunno. It sounds a lot like spam.
Q: It's not spam you asshole. How dare you suggest such
a thing. It's insulting.
A: I didn't suggest anything. I just stated the obvious. If you had a white
Volkswagen beetle with the number 53 painted on it, would it be insulting if
I said it looks sort of like Herbie the Love Bug?
Q: Yes, it would be insulting because it's clearly not
Herbie the Love Bug.
A: Right. Well ok then. I'll check out Blog-Mothra and see what it's all about.
Q: Great. Just know that if you share your opinion about
Blog-Mothra, that opinion better be positive or else.
A: Will do chief.
Q: Hey, did you hear about that new many-blogging application
that publishes content to thousands of blogs?
A: I don't think so. What's it called?
Q: It's called Blog-Ghidrah and it's designed to change
the way you blog.
A: Neat. So it could help people with their Avon business then?
Q: Absolutely. It allows you to customize your message
to thousands of people with a fraction of the effort it would have taken to
do it without Blog-Ghidrah.
A: What's the price?
Q: Not a lot. You see, the wonderful thing is that you
earn cash from it. Each blog has Yahoo Ads and when someone clicks them, you
get paid. The more blogs you have, the more cash you get! It's that simple.
A: I dunno. It sounds a lot like spam.
Q: It's not spam you punk. How dare you suggest such
a thing. It's insulting.
A: I didn't suggest anything. I just stated the obvious. If you had
a red 1969 Dodge Charger with a rebel battle flag painted on the top, would
it be insulting if I said it looks sort of like the General Lee from Dukes
of Hazard?
Q: Yes, it would be insulting because it's clearly not
the General Lee.
A: Right. Well ok then. I'll check out Blog-Ghidrah and see what it's
all about.
Q: Great. Just know that if you share your opinion about
Blog-Ghidrah, that opinion should be positive or else.
A: Will do captain.
Q: Hey, did you hear about that new lotta-blogging application
that publishes content to thousands of blogs?
A: I don't think so. What's it called?
Q: It's called Blog-Megalon and it's created to change
the way you blog.
A: Keen. So it could assist people with their Passport business then?
Q: Definitely. It enables you to customize your posts
to thousands of people with a fraction of the effort it would have taken to
do it without Blog-Megalon.
A: What's the price?
Q: The cost is tiny. See, the cool thing is that you
earn dollars from it. Each blog has Quigo Ads and when someone clicks them,
you get dollars. The more blogs you have, the more dollars you get! Isn't that
fun?
A: I dunno. It sounds a lot like spam.
Q: It's not spam you dork. How dare you suggest such
a thing. It's insulting.
A: I didn't suggest anything. I just stated the obvious. If you had
a black Trans Am with a glowing red light in the grill, would it be insulting
if I said it looks sort of like KITT?
Q: Yes, it would be insulting because it's clearly not
KITT.
A: Right. Well ok then. I'll check out Blog-Megalon and see what it's
all about.
Q: Great. Just know that if you share your opinion about
Blog-Megalon, that opinion should be glowing or else.
A: Will do boss.
July 28, 2005
Not The First
By QBlog in Blog News
Apparently I'm not the first person to criticize Dan Hollings' Blog-Zilla multi-blogging application and I suspect I won't be the last.
Today I discovered a few sites that seem to take Hollings, and Blog-Zilla, to task.
- Plagiarism Made Easier - Or Not? (part 2.) - July 13, 2005
- Killing the Golden Goose - June 17, 2005
- On Blog Plagiarism Software? - July 13, 2005
- Spam Blogs - July 12, 2005 (mostly in German)
- Methods of multi-blogging - "...Sadly BlogZilla doesn't do this and produces very obvious 'cookie cutter' pages."
Who else doesn't like Blog-Zilla? Who does like it? Who's using it? If you've signed up to be a Blog-Zilla customer I'd love to hear from you.
Dan Hollings Responds
By QBlog in Blog News
Sometimes what I post on this blog ruffles a few feathers. That's fine, people aren't required to agree with my perceptions. Yesterday I published comments critical of a new blogging tool called Blog-Zilla. Dan Hollings, Blog-Zilla's creator, took issue with my post and responded in an email as well as within the comments of the post.
I've posted excerpts from Hollings' comments below but the full text, unedited, is available for reference. Hollings' comments appear in italics and my responses appear in blue.
First. Multi-blogging is a new phenomena that allows people, entrepreneurs, businesses and organizations to manage multiple blogs each targeted or personalized to a specific readership. The idea was not invented by me, but he has created software to assist legitimate publishers and bloggers multi-blog. It follows the identical logic that a personalized newsletter follows. It is rules based and has capabilities much like common mail merge programs.
Hollings makes an incorrect comparison. This is not like newsletters because a newsletter is distributed to an email inbox and often archived on the Web at a single site. Emails are not (under normal conditions) included in search results. The long-term impact of emails on the Web is the same whether I send one email or one Billion.
An Avon consultant would not read my blog if it talked about MLM...
That's an assumption. There's a very popular forum called Making the Run that gives tips, advice and opinions to people from a multitude of different professions and interests. Another example is the Business Opportunities Blog which has a very diverse audience. I think Hollings is grossly underestimating his potential audience.
You know my content is not garbage.
Yes, and I clearly conceded that in my post. "Technically, it's not quite spamming since there is some genuine content but I don't know what else to call it." Hollings has some valuable content but some of the Quixtar Google Bomb blogs could make a similar argument. Not all were pure nonsense, just most. What I'm pointing out is the spam-like nature of duplicating that content across dozens of blogs and the parallels with Quixtar's WRTF
Duplicating Content?
...an analysis with a duplicate content checker shows that my blogs range from 25% to 60% DIFFERENT when compared one against another...
What's a "duplicate content checker?" Most bloggers don't need such tools because they don't regularly duplicate their content across dozens of blogs.
I invite anyone interested to READ the description of Blog-zilla again (http://blog-zilla.com) and note the ANTI-SPAM notice "Spammers Beware" clearly published on the site.
There are laws against spamming, but that hasn't stopped it. Napster made it clear that copyright infringement was wrong, but that didn't help them in court. I'm glad Hollings has Anti-Spam notices, but that doesn't change the nature of the software.
In addition, please review our strict ANTI-DUPLICATION, ANTI-SCRAPE, ANTI-CONTENT STEALING policy. Blog-zilla is NOT a spam or thieving tool. Blog-zilla has ZERO cabability to "harvesting content from various sites"...
I never accused Hollings of stealing anything. However, I'll also point out that to my knowledge, Quixtar's WRTF never "stole" anything either.
All Blog-zilla users go through a qualification survey to eliminate potential spammers.
Hollings forgot to add "All Blog-zilla users with money go through a qualification survey..."
Dealing With Content and Costs
[From Blog-Zilla's license agreement and rules]
Blog-zilla can be used to post RSS feeds to multiple blogs, but if you are not also posting other quality content, your account can be terminated.
Interesting term. So who's making the determination about what's "quality content?" Hollings? Some neutral third-party? What if I had a Blog-Zilla account and published yesterday's post about Blog-Zilla to 100 blogs. I believe it's "quality content" but would Hollings agree?
...each subscriber goes into a trial period (cost is $1) and while users evaluate Blog-zilla, Blog-zilla evaluates the subscriber by monitoring their posts and observing their participation in weekly conference call training classes.
What, if any, is the cost of those conference calls and training sessions? Do they compare with the rates listed on DanHollings.com?
- 1 Hour One-on-one Consultation $189
- Personal Web Site Evaluation $149
- Four 1 Hour Sessions - One per week $99 per week
- Four 1 Hour Sessions - One per month $149 per month
- Unlimited On-call Consultation $949 per month
Disappointed
Eric Scheibeler was greatly disappointed that other similar topic sites and like minded people (including Eric Janssen) did not do more to offer support for this effort. Instead, support was lacluster and criticle. In fact, Eric Janssen was given the unique sponsorship of word #1 in Scheibeler's LGTWO "Merchants of Deception" online book, yet not even a thanks was ever received. Guess it was just too "link-laden" as Janssen states. Go figure.
Unfortunately this comment is both personal and misleading. I would prefer that Eric Scheibeler speak for himself on this matter unless Hollings is in a position to speak on his behalf. By the way, I did thank Scheibeler for his generosity.
You attempt to link my reputation and activities to those like the Google bombing by Quixtar and to porn sites. Give us all a break Mr. Eric; the only garbage I see is the garbage in your post. Who's spamming who?
I merely presented my opinions about the facts as I found them. If that's spam, then so be it.
Please let me know how you feel about my post. Whether you love it, hate it, think it was unfair or right on — I want to hear about it.
Thanks!
July 27, 2005
Speaking of Scoundrels...
By QBlog in Blog News
What is it that bugs me most about Quixtar subverting search results to squelch criticism? As I've said before, my main complaint with Quixtar's Web Reputation Task Force is that it essentially flooded the Web with crap intended to bury legitimate sites under a sea of PR pabulum. It was designed to confuse rather than inform.
Besides me there were a couple of other folks who worked to expose Quixtar's WRTF, most notably Dan Hollings. Hollings is a "former top-banana networker, coach and web developer behind big name companys, well known trainers and little known ordinary folk."
He's the guy who originally added Quixtar to the Wikipedia entry for Google Bombing. He set up Eric Schebelier's link-laden Let's Get The Word Out site. He also claims that BWW swindled him out of a lot of cash. And now he's apparently created his own WRTF that does one better than Quixtar's — his makes money.
According to a July 12 press release, Hollings has launched something called Blog-Zilla that promises to post 100 blogs in 100 minutes.
Dan's hands-on experience in web system design and internet marketing all came into play as the Blog-zilla idea was slowly hatched and went into beta testing. As anticipated, the results were monstrous. The first week, Dan posted unique content to 100 blogs, and again the next week, and the next. What used to take 1 hour to write and post to a single blog, now took two hours, but it was posted to 100 blogs.
Let's take a look at some of that "unique" content. Below are links to four separate posts on blogs (chosen at random) linked from the 100 Blogs page.
Read each of those posts. Notice the similarities? It's the same thing posted over and over again with a few changes to appear relevant to the alleged topic. That's not much different than what Quixtar did.
Money
And what about the money? Where Quixtar paid people to run their spam-like campaign, Hollings is making money from his.
Did we say "multiple blogs"? Yes, as an example, Blogger.com allows unlimited blogs under one account and there is no limit on the number of posts you can have! If you can earn $100 a month from one blog, what might you earn from 30 blogs?
...Subscribers to Blogzilla will pay a monthly fee (to be determined) and gain member only access to special trainings by one of the web's top internet marketing consultants.
I'll be honest, as I'm writing this my blood pressure is rising. What a freakin' hypocrite. Hollings lambasts Quixtar for flooding the Web with nonsense and then turns around and uses it as a business model!
There's a simple, four-letter word that describes Blog-Zilla — SPAM! This is not much more than spamming the Web with blogs. Technically, it's not quite spamming since there is some genuine content but I don't know what else to call it. This is similar to the type of exploitation that killed the original search engines with a flood of porn sites.
Problem For Critics
Some Quixtar critics have praised Hollings for working with Eric Scheibeler to distribute his whistleblower book, Merchants of Deception. Sure, I'm glad that such information is available but I hope those same critics won't hesitate to join me in criticizing Hollings and his spam-like ways. I encourage you to email him and let him know how you feel.
Need A Change?
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
Tired of the Quixtar BLOG Forum? Yearn for the freewheeling Amway boards of yesteryear like GetFacts and Quixtar NOW? Well, Bruce Anderson runs a forum called the Baboon Brief that just might scratch your itch. Check it out, you might like it.
July 26, 2005
Majority or Minority?
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
In most organizations, from multinational corporations to your local chess club, there are "good" and "bad" apples. A good apple might be someone you like and respect while a bad apple might be someone you despise and avoid. Most people can tolerate a few bad apples in an organization if it's primarily comprised of good apples.
However, when the good and bad apple ratio shifts, and the bad apples begin outnumbering the good ones, the entire organization suffers and often becomes intolerable. To better illustrate my point I'll provide an example.
Imagine that Mary volunteers at a homeless outreach. She enjoys working with others to help those less fortunate. Mary doesn't mind that out of the 15 staffers and 40 volunteers there are a couple of men who swear like sailors and tell crude jokes during break. She makes it clear that she doesn't appreciate such behavior and chooses not to fraternize with them during her breaks.
Now, imagine that same outreach filled with cursing sailors. Almost every staffer, including the director, is a crude son-of-a-gun who pokes fun at the homeless behind their backs. After volunteering for a couple of uncomfortable weeks Mary decides to find another outreach, one where she feels more comfortable. She later learns that the outreach she started with has a bad reputation within the community.
Professor Yeti
Yesterday I discovered an interesting post about Quixtar from Professor Yeti. Get Behind Me, Quixtar describes a first encounter with a Quixtar IBO who's pitch is legally challenged at best.
But now was the time for the method of this miracle machine to be unveiled. Quixtar, he explained, is like an online mall where you get paid to shop. The secret is that you can only sign up through word-of-mouth advertising - in this case the mouth being Jerry's. You buy things you'd buy anyway, like soap and toilet paper, but with key differences: the products are 30% cheaper, you get a percentage of your money back, and you have the chance to sign up others and receive percentages of profit from what they buy. And who of your friends and family wouldn't want to sign up, knowing they're getting things cheaper and that you, their friend or relative, are making money in the process?
You absolutely must read the entire post, it's quite revealing. There's not a single mention of retailing products to anyone.
What I'm wondering about is if Professor Yeti's experience is the exception or the rule? I've asked this question before but I think it deserves repeating.
Time and time again I find blog posts recounting a Quixtar IBO encounter where the IBO misrepresented the opportunity, misled or lied to the blogging prospect. Such experiences are consistent with the testimonies I find in my inbox, on Forums and in the comments of this blog.
I hear that there are some IBOs who correctly and ethically present the plan. I know a few who do this and I applaud them for obeying the law and Quixtar's own rules. Yet I can't help but think that those IBOs are a small minority, outnumbered by the types that Professor Yeti (and others) describe over and over again.
Does Quixtar have some heroes? You bet. Does it have some scoundrels? Of course. Are there many more heroes than scoundrels? I'm not sure if I can answer that question. Can you?
July 25, 2005
Monday Reader Mail: 52
By QBlog in Reader Mail
Screw the 70% Rule. It's too complicated to understand. It makes my head hurt. Just don't fill your garage with products and you'll be fine. Right?
name: Jerry
date: July 21, 2005
message: Ok, I've been getting the pitch. When I brought up the 70% rule they chuckled.When I explained the The Mich Att. Gen made it clear this was a very important point to make a MLM legal, I was told that the AG didn't know what he was talking about. That nobody sells, you just buy what you need.
things that make you go hmmmmm.
What the hell do those Attorneys General know about Multilevel Marketing anyway?
July 24, 2005
Sticky Wicket
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
I love saying "sticky wicket." Go ahead, say it. See, isn't that fun?
And to increase your pleasure try pronouncing it with a faux, cockney-flavored British accent. Now say it with an Indian-English accent, like Apu from The Simpsons.
Having fun yet? I know I am. Sometimes I find myself in a bit of a sticky wicket. It's bloody 'ell.
Another fun word is chrysanthemum. Fill your mouth full of jelly beans and say the word "chrysanthemum."
I suppose I should get the regulars caught up on what's what. I survived the "family vacation" with just a few minor injuries and the kids are already plotting planning next year's summer adventure.
And a big thanks to the mysterious QBlog alter-ego known only as "Not QBlog" for keeping things interesting in my absence. I wish I could say that "Not QBlog" was my first choice for the guest posting position but there were several others who passed on the opportunity for various reasons.
Gene Simmons had to do an interview with Carlos Mencia, John Moltz said he's "too popular to waste time on QBlog" and it turns out that Pedro Sanchez is a fictional character played by actor Efren Ramirez. Bummer.
And of course Jason Kottke couldn't do it because he spends all his free time watching movies that he rents with money donated by gullible bloggers. So as it turns out, "Not QBlog" was "Not Busy" and "Not Working" which made for a perfect guest blogger person while I was "Not Around."
Now, say "Mid-South Mitsubishi Distribution Center" five times fast. Go ahead. Don't be shy. It's fun.
July 23, 2005
Won't let the screen door hit me
By Not QBlog in Miscellaneous
Hey, Q Blog is due back and I'm on my way out. It's been fun sitting in the "big chair" for a few days.
One thing that was confirmed for me this week is that the Quixtar BLOG and Forum mean a lot to a whole lot of people out there, whether they're seeking information, looking for a fight, trying to persuade others, or just looking for some meaning in what they've been through.
I applaud Q Blog for providing a place for all of that and more. It is an awesome responsibility, and probably an equally awesome burden at times. Still, his commitment keeps the blog and forum vital and relevant for everyone who comes here, for whatever reason.
So thanks, Q Blog for sharing some of that with me. And thanks to you all for reading and commenting. It's been an honor.
Not QBlog
July 23, 2005
July 22, 2005
Walking the talk on "Walk With Me"
By Not QBlog in Miscellaneous
I see that Quixtar is a corporate sponsor of the Easter Seals "Walk With Me" program, in which people in cities around the country participate in various "walk-a-thon" type events to raise money to help those with disabilities.
Easter Seals, for those who aren't familiar, is an organization that long has provided assistance to people with disabilities, along with support to their families.
According to Quixtar's online "Newsroom" the company recently won recognition from Easter Seals for its 2004 contributions, which totaled $800,000 from Quixtar and its IBOs. Clearly the company and IBOs alike have a soft spot for this particular charity. And who wouldn't, after all. It is a worthwhile cause.
Teams can sign up online to participate
Because it's Easter Seals and it's on the up-and-up, I decided to do a little more research on Walk With Me. A link from Q's Newsroom led me to the Team Quixtar page, where you can search for an event in your own community.
You can sign up for an upcoming event right there on the website. The teams and participants who've already registered in each city are listed there, along with registration deadline and route details for each event.
No teams yet for the Grand Rapids event
I didn't see a Walk listed for my community, but for fun I did a search on Michigan, which is Quixtar's home state.
The search turned up a Walk With Me event scheduled for October 1 in Grand Rapids, which is the city nearest Quixtar's headquarters in Ada. Curiously, it is not listed among the events taking place in other cities this year.
But here's something even more curious: NO teams are as yet registered to participate on behalf of Quixtar in the October 1 walk. No IBO teams. No teams from Quixtar headquarters.
Now maybe the teams haven't yet been posted to the site. Or maybe it's just too early to have signed up to participate in an event that is over two months away. I'm willing to give Quixtar the benefit of the doubt here. Surely this is something they'd promote with employees big time. With what, 900-plus people working for the company (I believe that's the number I've seen), surely Q could turn out a good-sized team. And surely they will.
I'll keep my eye on it. I just know they'll come through for such a worthwhile cause.
July 21, 2005
Young and in love with Quixtar
By Not QBlog in Quixtar
I came across this blog today and it got me wondering: Is this the face of the "new" Quixtar IBO? Or is it a fairly typical portrait? Two people who are very young, in love, excited about life -- and excited about where Quixtar is going to take them.
July 20, 2005
How was it for you?
By Not QBlog in Miscellaneous
Do you remember the first time you were prospected by someone in the Amway or Quixtar business?
The first time, you ask? Well, yeah, haven't you been prospected several times over the years, like I have?
The first pitch came from a college classmate. Phil always wore a suit to class -- it was a night class, so this wasn't so unusual. Though when I think back, it showed the extent to which he embraced the business at the time. Anyhow, we were all aspiring writers, and his writing was ambitious, if uneven, fast-paced, trying-to-be detective fiction, which to me, also is on "type." We read our stuff aloud to the class, and somehow during a break he zeroed in on me.
I don't even remember how he wrangled an invitation to the married housing unit my spouse and I occupied at the time. I do remember he was surprised that we didn't seem to live hand-to-mouth like many married students did. Undeterred, he went ahead with his pitch over coffee in our tiny little kitchen, asking about our dreams and drawing circles on a pad of paper. We were unmoved. The idea of trying to convince a bunch of other people to do such a thing with us made it a no-brainer. "No way," we said. The end.
The next pitch: same time period, same place. This time it was our next door neighbors. Jenni was pregnant. Steve was ambitious. They approached us from the product angle, and they actually got somewhere with us at first, albeit only as retail customers. We bought into the SA8 system hook, line, and sinker: Detergent, fabric softener, Smashing White for the hard water. Oh man, we loved that stuff (being newly marrieds, we did the laundromat thing together religiously). But I marvel still at how much money we irresponsibly spent on that initial order -- the power of concentration notwithstanding.
The final time was more recent -- right before the start of Quixtar, as near as I can tell. Someone the spouse works with offered up a mini CD describing an Internet business in a very oblique but intriguing way. The pitch was from the perspective of an online business that just seemed to perpetuate itself. It was the closest we ever came to signing on. But then came the nagging doubt again: yes, this idea may be easier to spread via the Internet, but you still have to convince people to go with you. Maybe it's not as hard as cold-knocking on people's doors, but it is, at its base, the same principle. Again -- no way.
The funny thing about all three of these encounters was that each time, the idea seemed really exciting to us (even with the product pitch -- the idea of buying these special, super-concentrated products that you couldn't just get anywhere was somehow very appealing). But then -- fortunately, I guess -- reality set in, and we could not bring ourselves to sign on. I don't know about the spouse, but that always left me feeling slightly inferior -- like I wasn't quite good enough to meet the challenge. Yet I was always thankful that I knew myself well enough to realize this was not a business I could do.
July 19, 2005
Duck and Cover
By Not QBlog in Miscellaneous
OK, you guys talked quite a bit yesterday about films. Not one of my favorite subjects (you'll notice I didn't mention movies; someone else brought it up), but hey, I'm only facilitating here.
The 1951 Civil Defense film "Duck and Cover" was added to the National Film Registry last year as "culturally, historically and aesthetically significant" motion picture.
If you're too young to remember civil defense drills, this will seem especially hilarious. If you're more of a geezer, I imagine the memory evoked by this film is uncomfortably haunting.
To me, it is simply an amazing example of what we can make ourselves believe ... what we can let ourselves fear.
Reference: boingboing
July 18, 2005
The House Guest
By Not QBlog in Miscellaneous
So. Here I am. In charge of the mighty, mighty Quixtar BLOG.
Wow. What an awesome responsibility. Just me and all you thousands of readers. What should I write about? Q Blog didn't give me any instructions, really. Just a few "don'ts" like,
- Don't get personal
- Don't post pictures wider than 320 pixels
- Don't respond to a comment when you're mad
Stay away from those and "you'll be golden," he told me.
Well, I've been reading this blog for awhile and I know better than that. Q Blog holds himself to a high standard for content (most of the time) and you guys are tough customers. The only way I figure I can possibly measure up is to do something different. But what?
Nothing might be nice ... Or how 'bout a quote?
Right away I thought maybe I could play hooky. Yeah. I could not write something and you could not read it and you could totally not leave any comments and ... Oh. Wait. I think he'd catch on to that. No posts. No comments. That would be kind of obvious. He might not appreciate it, either, if over the course of four or five days I lost his reader base.
Then I thought I could just post a week's worth of pithy quotes. Something to get you thinking as you began each day. Something brief, yet so powerful that you'd be inspired to go forth and make the world a better place. Something like:
"Don't let anyone steal your dreams."
Hmmm. Well, on second thought, maybe not.
The easy road's always best
So in the end I'm left with my fallback idea, the easy way out. And I want to tell ya, it's an original: Let the reader decide.
How 'bout it girls and boys? What do you want to talk about? We could talk baseball. Dogs. Music. Saving the world. OK, Quixtar. Anything you want.
Leave a comment. Spark an idea. Get something started with me. Who knows? Maybe we'll start our own spin off: Son of Quixtar BLOG. Or The Not Quixtar BLOG. No matter what: Let's just have some fun this week while Q Blog's away.
July 17, 2005
The Guest House
By QBlog in Blog News
I'm leaving town for a few days to participate in something called a "family vacation." It's a truly bizarre concept that I've decided to adopt as a family tradition. We load a vehicle full of luggage, children, food and toys — then drive for several hours until we either a.) reach our destination or b.) a child needs emergency medical attention to have a Lego removed from an ear.
So, while I'm gone I've asked my alter-ego to guest post to the Quixtar BLOG and hopefully give all you devoted fans a reason to keep checking back in my absence. My alter-ego is Not QBlog and therefore will post under the name "Not QBlog." Clever huh? Also, contrary to what you may have heard in the rumor mill, my alter-ego is not my evil twin. My evil twin is still locked safely away in Arkham Asylum.
Now I know what you're thinking, "what's an alter-ego?" Well, it's sort of like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Mr. Hyde was Dr. Jekyll's alter-ego. But don't fear, this alter-ego isn't a hulking beast bent on terrorizing England. This alter-ego is kind and gentle and caring and likes long walks on the beach and picking daisies in the meadow... or something.
Ok, enough explaining. Enjoy the guest posts. I'm out. See you next week!
July 16, 2005
FYI
By QBlog in Blog News
If the foundation of your business is built on information control then your business will fail. Information cannot be controlled. With the Internet and improved global communications that control has evaporated.
If the thought of a world where you can't control the flow of information (positive, negative, neutral) about your business scares you then you're in the wrong business. Get out while you still can.
If you consider those who freely share information about your business to be your enemies then you'll quickly discover that you're in the midst of a civil war.
If your business is hesitant to share raw, audited data about its performance then chances are that it's hiding information it would rather you didn't know.
July 15, 2005
QBlog's Farcical Help Desk - 30
By QBlog in Farcical Help Desk
Every Friday, the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™ answers the Quixtar questions that nobody dared to ask. Additionally, each Help Desk answer is guaranteed to end with some form of punctuation or we'll refund your money. No fooling!
Question: How can I get in touch with Randy Binnaca?
Answer: Randy who? I don't know a Randy Binnaca.
Q: Or maybe it's Randy Bandito? Bandana? Backgammon?
A: You're not talking about Randy
Bancino, VP of Quixtar Sales & Marketing are you?
Q: That might be him. Is he a shortish bald guy?
A: Yes. That's him. Why do you want to get in touch with him?
Q: Well, I went to grad school with him at WMU
and he sort of owes me money. See, there was this bitchin' keg party at Frank's
and...
A: And you loaned him money for the keg right?
Q: No, nothing like that. See, Randy had a lot of fun.
I mean a LOT of fun. I mean, well you get what I mean. It's still known as "The
Randy Party." It's legendary at WMU. So there's this one guy there who
brought a camera and he started taking a lot of pictures. Basically everything
Randy did was on film. But nobody really thought about it until a week later Randy got
this envelope in the mail.
A: Blackmail huh? And let me guess, he didn't have the money so you loaned him
the cash to pay off the photographer guy right?
Q: No way, but close. See Randy knew this enforcer guy
who worked for a loan shark and he asked him to "take care" of the
photographer. So of course he didn't have the cash so I chipped in and... uh...
let's just say there are no pictures now.
A: Wait, wait, wait. You're telling me Randy Bancino borrowed money from you
to pay a thug to get rid of some incriminating photos? Bull. You're making this
up aren't you? You don't even know Randy do you?
Q: What? No. Why would you say that? Of course I know
Randy. We go way back.
A: What is the shape of the birthmark on the back of his neck?
Q: Looks like the island of Madagascar.
A: Wrong you liar. It looks like Scotland! Admit it. You're a phony and you
just made up that bogus story to get on the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™
didn't you?
Q: Ok, I admit it. I lied. I don't know Randy and have
never been to WMU. But I do have this great story about Ken McDonald.
A: Good-bye loser.
Q: Did you hear that Quixtar reformulated Nutrilite?
It now contains retsin.
A: Really? I think I heard something about that. What exactly is retsin?
Q: It's a special ingredient they put in the reformulated
Nutrilite.
A: Right. But what does it do? I mean is it a vegetable, animal or mineral?
Q: It's not any of those things. It's a special ingredient.
A: It has to be at least one of those things. It is comprised of something.
Q: Yeah, of course it's comprised of something.
A: Right... So, what is that something?
Q: What something?
A: The something that retsin is made from.
Q: Oh, that something. Well, it makes your
breath long-lasting fresh.
A: Ok, great. So what is it?
Q: Did I mention that Double X delivers more phytonutrients?
A: Good-bye.
Q: I'm looking for the Quixtar podcast.
A: What Quixtar podcast? You mean QBlog
Radio?
Q: No, that podcast is lame. I mean the official Quixtar
podcast from like the Quixtar business opportunity.
A: Yeah, well it doesn't exist.
Q: Doesn't exist? Why not? Podcasting is so cool and
it would be a great way for me to listen to all the greatest Diamond motivational
speakers on my iPod.
A: Right. Well, first you need to understand how Quixtar operates. After
a new technology has been introduced Quixtar will wait until that technology
has been used by pretty much everyone on the planet and virtually every other
business has been learning how to make money at it and only then does it decide
to embrace that technology. And by embrace I mean the type of embrace you give
your aunt Edna, you know the fat one who smells like stale cigarettes and you
sort of give that side-hug thing to.
Q: I see. No podcast now huh? So when can I expect one?
A: I'd look for one around 2009 and you can learn more about it by going
to Countdown9109.com.
Q: Talk about cutting edge.
A: I feel your pain.
- Getting a vibe that this guy was an Amway pest
By QBlog in Quixtar Chatter
- Getting a vibe that this guy was an Amway pest
"It was when I was picking cauliflowers that this desi decided to stick his face between me and the cauliflower basket"
Jody Victor And Missouri
By QBlog in Arbitration
Last November I posted about a videotape that surfaced as evidence in the now infamous "Hart Lawsuit" from Missouri. A description of that videotape made its way onto PACER (a public court records database) and explained that, among other things, Quixtar Diamond Jody Victor could be seen "woodshedding a JAMS facilitator" about a Plaintiff in a Florida arbitration case.
Of course the videotape was entered as evidence by the Plaintiffs (former tool distributors suing Quixtar et al.) to demonstrate that the Quixtar arbitration process is rigged. Watching Jody Victor "woodshed" a supposedly neutral arbitrator couldn't have helped the Defense.
And obviously Quixtar was upset that a description of the videotape was released to PACER and that websites like this one picked it up and published it for the rest of the world to read. So Quixtar filed a Motion to sanction the Plaintiffs and claimed that they were "harmed" by the publication of the videotape description.
The Order from Judge Richard Dorr (pdf), United States District Court, concedes that the Plaintiffs erred by not placing the videotape description under a Protective Order but says that the Defendants did not show how the publication was damaging to them.
The Court finds that Defendants Motion is due to be denied. While it may have been improper for the Plaintiffs to file these materials without the proper protection to Defendants of placing them "under seal," Plaintiffs corrected the mistake as soon as it was apparent to them. Additionally, Defendants have not demonstrated how they were harmed by the availability of the information for such a limited time. Defendants mention the publication on a few internet sites, however they have not shown how this publication was damaging to them.
This particular case is important to Quixtar because it may very well decide the fate of its Business Support Materials Arbitration Agreement. Scott Larsen has done an excellent job of detailing the important events in this case.
- Mandatory Arbitration Question goes to Missouri Supreme Court
- Alticor upset about "Quixtar-hating Internet zealots" and "Internet rumormongers"
July 14, 2005
Skype Me
By QBlog in Blog News
If you listen to QBlog Radio then you know about Skype. Skype is a free Internet Telephony service that allows people to "talk to anyone, anywhere for free."
Do you remember Net2Phone? Skype is like that only it doesn't suck. It's easy to download, easy to install and it really works.
Skype Into QBlog Radio
The reason I'm posting about Skype is because I want you to be able to participate in a QBlog Radio podcast. Once you install the software just add me as your buddy (my name Skype ID is "webraw") and send me a message. I can then record our conversation and include it in a QBlog Radio podcast.
And we don't have to talk about Quixtar or MLM or blogs or really anything. You can pop in to just say hi. There are no rules, we just want to have a little fun.
Equipment
You will need a few basics to Skype me. You should have a computer, working speakers or headphones and a microphone. A high speed Internet connection will also help but isn't absolutely necessary.
So download Skype and give it a try.
July 13, 2005
Do The Math
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
A member of the Quixtar BLOG Forum recently posted a thought-provoking entry that analyzes the math of the Quixtar business. I made a few edits for grammar.
» From Let's Do The Math on a Direct Group
2004 commissions paid ($373,000,000) divided by average commission ($115/month x 12) = ($1,380)
Number of active IBOs (270,290) times the success rate of Diamonds (0.0076%)
Number of Diamonds (21) divided into number of "active" IBOs (270,290)
Number of IBOs per Diamond = (13,158)
That's 13,158 people making practically nothing. Of course the Diamond is only making about $149,942 before business expenses and taxes.
That's good money, but not exactly millionaire money. Gee, I wonder where that million dollar lifestyle comes from? Oh yeah, the 13,158 people below them throwing (conservatively) $200 a month into the tool system.
$200 x 12 x 13158 = $31,579,200.
NOW THAT'S MILLIONARE MONEY!
Now, after reading that analysis tell me what's right or wrong with it. Is the number of IBOs per Diamond off? If so, what should that number be? Keep in mind, most of the numbers in this analysis come straight from Quixtar.
July 12, 2005
- The Work Blows Lifestyle
By QBlog in Quixtar Chatter
- The Work Blows Lifestyle
"MLM (Amway, Quixtar)"
Quixtar Listens
By QBlog in Quixtar
Last week I pointed out a couple of minor usability issues at Quixtar.com. I'm happy to report that Quixtar has completely corrected those issues.
Now when I go to the beverages page the Kahveccino promotional graphic links to a page selling Kahveccino instead of an error page. Also, clicking the Kahve Coffee link pulls up the same product page, with both flavors of Kahveccino listed at the top.
Thanks for listening Quixtar. I'm working on some more suggestions on how to improve the Quixtar.com experience. Stay tuned!
July 11, 2005
Monday Reader Mail: 51
By QBlog in Reader Mail
To prove that not all Reader Mail is filled with obscenity-laced diatribes I offer the following submission from Joy Z. No, not Jay-Z but Joy Z.
name: Joy Z.
date: July 8, 2005
message: I came across your website and I am so happy I did. I feel like I am not the only one who is experiencing the after effects of the Quixtar experience. I too was an IBO and I walked away from it. I only wish I did it sooner.
Still, I can not find the words to explain the experience, its sort of like those good dream bad dream experiences of "What the hell was I doing there?" Anyway, thanks for reading this so far. Have a great day. You're doing a good thing here. I will keep reading your blog. Best wishes!!
Thanks Joy Z. Glad you like the blog. Have a safe and pleasant day.
Failure With Cruise
By QBlog in Humor
I'm back from the Tom Cruise intervention and I'm sad to report that we (his friends) were unsuccessful. It appears that Tom is certifiably nuts and needs more help than we can provide. He refused psychiatric therapy claiming that something called Scientology would heal what ails him. Too bad.
However, there was a bit of good news that resulted from our efforts. Tom gave us all free tickets to War of the Worlds.
Anyway, it's good to be back.
DeVos For Governor?
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
From NixGuy.com, "a network administrator blogging about tech and politics from suburban Cincinnati."
Focus on the MI Governor's race: Oh, no.
In an ideal world, the Michigan GOP would do a sister-souljah on the Devoses and tell them while their money is welcome, their influence and control is not. Unfortunately we do not live in an ideal world and Dick Devos, son of the founder of Amway and former chairman of the company has announced his candidacy for governor of Michigan.
With the money he's spread around and his longtime activities he must be viewed as frontrunner for the GOP nomination. On the issues his conservative credentials are solid, that's not the problem. The problem is that the pall of Amway is going to hang over this campaign and remind every Michigan voter that Amway money controls the Michigan GOP. Not good.
July 10, 2005
- Quixtar T-Shirt
By QBlog in Quixtar Chatter
- Quixtar T-Shirt
"Don't Talk To Me About Quixtar"
July 8, 2005
Saving Maverick
By QBlog in Humor
I will be away from the blog this weekend attending an ad hoc intervention for my good friend Tom Cruise. I'm one of several friends who are concerned for Tom's mental state and we feel that swift action is required before he goes totally insane.
While I'm away, feel free to discuss your opinions about America's favorite "little person," Tom Cruise.
I'll be back with a full report on Monday.
Revenge of the QBlog Curse
By QBlog in Miscellaneous
I'm beginning to believe that the QBlog Curse is real. I'll explain.
My wife is a Quixtar Member. She joined up last year with the intent of buying some Artistry products. She never actually bought those products for various reasons but I ended up buying some XS Cherry Blast last October. And while I really enjoyed the drinks, the Quixtar shopping experience didn't go as smoothly as I'd hoped. But what the hell, mistakes can happen in any business right? You bet.
So today I decided to shop around Quixtar to find something else to review. The Kahveccino drinks on the Beverages page looked tasty so I got out my bank card to purchase a 12-pack. Notice the KAHVE promotion in the graphic below? That's what I clicked to start the purchasing process.
However, after clicking the promotion I was greeted with the following error page. Was this a temporary glitch? Apparently not. I checked back several times throughout the day with the same results.
But hey, errors happen right? Sure. Now, where would Quixtar put a flavored Cappuccino drink? Hmmm. Maybe under the "Cappuccino, Hot Cocoa, Cider & Soup" category? Well, as you can see below, the Khaveccino I desired was absent from the Cappuccino category. Where to next?
Aha! There's a Khave Coffee category which I suppose is the parent brand of Khaveccino. Success right? Well, maybe not. As you can see the Khaveccino was placed at the bottom of the second page of the Khave category. I nearly overlooked it but my persistence paid off.
Now the delicious Kahveccino was just a few mouse clicks away. I noticed the price, $25.65, but heck that's just a bit more than $2 per 14 ounce bottle which doesn't seem so bad. Sure, it's pricey but I can deal with that for a product review right?
Wrong! After taxes and standard shipping the bill totaled $34.05 for a dozen 14 ounce bottles of Mocha Kahveccino. That's over $2.80 per bottle. My common sense kicked in and whispered, "there's no way you're paying $34.05 for those 12 bottles." However, after doing a little Froogling I found that buying a dozen bottles of Starbucks Frapuccinno actually cost a little more per ounce ($.26 per ounce compared to Quixtar's $.20.2). Yipes! This coffee stuff ain't cheap.
So, about that QBlog Curse...
Maybe I'm not really cursed but I was a little miffed that getting the Kahveccino in my shopping cart wasn't as simple as I'd expected. Oh well, next time I bet everything will work perfectly and the QBlog Curse will go the way of the Bambino's Curse.
July 5, 2005
Tool Wallpaper
By QBlog in A/QMOs
» Download Your Tool Wallpaper Today - 1024 x 768
July 4, 2005
Monday Reader Mail: 50
By QBlog in Reader Mail
Happy Independence Day America! This week's Reader Mail is from a cartoonist who wants to share his comics with the QBlog readers.
name: Francois T.
date: June 27, 2005
message: Hello ! I've been following your blog for a while, and I saw you have comics going on. I've recently started making my own comics, and I made some about Amway. If you want to check them out, here they are:
- Draw Those Circles
- One Book To Rule Them All
- And In The Darkness Bind Them
- The Madness of Crowds
- Newfound Riches
I thought you might get a kick out of them. I also have a list of my comics at Insolitology.
Enjoy and don't blow off any important digits as you're celebrating the holiday.
July 3, 2005
Blogging 101 - Summer Vacation
By QBlog in Blogging 101
Blogging 101 is taking a brief break this summer. It will be back in a few weeks but for now you can read the archives to get your dose of Blogging 101.
July 2, 2005
QBlog Toons - Before And After
By QBlog in Humor
July 1, 2005
QBlog's Farcical Help Desk - 29
By QBlog in Farcical Help Desk
Every Friday, the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™ answers the Quixtar questions that nobody dared to ask. Additionally, each Help Desk answer is guaranteed to end with some form of punctuation or we'll refund your money. No fooling!
Question: I heard Tom Cruise was in Quixtar. I L-O-V-E
Tom Cruise. Have loved him ever since he stole my heart in Top Gun?
I absolutely must become a Quixtar IBO so that I can be like Tom.
Answer: Actually, you're thinking of Scientology, not Quixtar. Tom Cruise is
a vocal proponent of Scientology and to my knowledge, has never been involved
with Quixtar at all.
Q: Really? You're sure he's not in Quixtar? Wow. I could
have sworn he said something about Quixtar in his Today Show interview.
A: Yeah, I'm sure. Tom Cruise has never been in Quixtar though he did play a
sort of sexual self-help guru in the movie Magnolia.
Q: Oh yeah, I remember that movie. It was really weird.
Tom and Nicole Kidman were like in some freaky sex cult and everyone wore masks
or something.
A: No, that was Eyes Wide Shut directed by Stanley Kubrick. Magnolia
was an ensemble flick set in California.
Q: Hmmm... was that anything like Rain Man?
I really liked that movie. Isn't that where he says, "Show me the money?"
A: I don't think so. No. Definitely not.
Q: I see. Well anyway, if Tom isn't in Quixtar then
I guess I'm not interested. Thanks anyway.
A: Fess up, you've never seen any Tom Cruise movie except Top Gun have
you?
Q: Well, uh. No, I saw that one with the race cars.
What's it called?
A: Days of Thunder?
Q: No, it was Faster and Furious or something?
A: You mean The Fast and the Furious. You're so busted. Who is this
anyway?
Q: Katie Holmes. Why?
A: Just curious.
Q: Why did the Quixtar leaders start blogging?
A: Well, nobody's really sure but there are a few theories floating around out
there. The most popular theory is that the Quixtar leaders think the next wave
of E-Commerce is MLM Blogging.
Q: You mean blogging about Multilevel Marketing?
A: No, I mean that you get three bloggers to sign up underneath you and teach
them how to blog for themselves and get them teach three others to blog and
then you retire with your residual income.
Q: Wow but how's the money made?
A: That's the part nobody has quite figured out. But the Diamonds are
a bright bunch of guys and they plan to build the MLM Blogging network first
and then figure out how to make money later.
Q: That doesn't make much sense.
A: No, it doesn't but it is a popular theory. Another theory is that
the Quixtar leaders have a rare neurological disorder that affects them ONLY
when they come in contact with computers connected to the Internet. The disorder
compells them to post complete nonsense and then duplicate it across multiple
blogs. Psychologists and neurologists are baffled.
Q: Well that's just stupid. Any other theories?
A: Well, there's one more. Some think that all the Quixtar leader blogs
are typed by lab rats who get chocolates after filling a page with "content."
Q: I'm a Quixtar employee and I love the QBlog. What
am I to do?
A: Nurture your love of the QBlog. Don't be ashamed that you love the QBlog.
Many people love the QBlog. The QBlog is irresistable.
Q: But I read it and feel so guilty for reading it.
What if my boss found out that I read it? I might get fired!
A: Baby, your boss reads the QBlog every damn day. Your boss loves the
QBlog just like you love the QBlog. Everyone loves the QBlog.
Q: Yes, I do love the QBlog. It's so funny and witty
and informative that I just can't help myself. And I even love those creepy
eyes.
A: The creepy eyes know that you love them. The creepy eyes symbolize
the all-knowing QBlog. Those creepy eyes are looking right at you baby.
Q: So, I should embrace my love of the QBlog instead
of being ashamed of it?
A: That's right. Wear your QBlog love like a badge on your sleeve and
you know what will happen? QBlog will love you right back. That's right. In
fact, there's a QBlog party at the pool this weekend and all you lovely Quixtar
employees are invited.
Q: Wow, thanks. That's awesome. I'll be there.
A: I know you will.