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December 23, 2005
QBlog's Farcical Help Desk - Christmas Edition
By QBlog in Farcical Help Desk
Every Friday, the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™ answers the Quixtar questions that nobody dared to ask. Additionally, each Help Desk answer is guaranteed to end with some form of punctuation or we'll refund your money. No fooling!
Question: Why isn't Santa a Quixtar Diamond?
Answer: Hmmmmm... Maybe because he's not real?
Q: Hey! Hey! Stop that crazy talk. Of course Santa's
real.
A: Come on. There's no way some dude could fly around and deliver presents to
all those children in one night. You can't be serious.
Q: I'm totally serious. You know why? Because I believe!
I believe in something bigger than myself. I learned long ago that if you just
believe enough the facts don't matter.
A: Wow, where have I heard that before? Hmmm.
Anyway. So Santa's real and you want to know why he's not a Quixtar Diamond. I'll play along. Maybe because he lives at the North Pole and doesn't have much of an opportunity to show the plan. And when he does get out he's usually interacting with children who can't join Quixtar.
How's that?
Q: Yeah. I guess that makes sense. Do you think Santa
drinks XS Energy Drinks?
A: I can't do this. No! No, Santa doesn't drink XS. He drinks heavily spiked
Egg Nogg and eats lots pork. Good grief.
Q: Ummm... you're a real Scrooge.
A: Bah humbug. Get lost.
Q: I've got this awesome idea for Quixtar. It's killer
man.
A: Oh boy! What is it?
Q: PV/BV gift cards.
A: Ummmmm...
Q: You know, like those cards you get at Best Buy or
a restaurant or something...
A: I'm familiar with gift cards but why would you want to put PV/BV
on a gift card?
Q: Think about it. Your struggling downline needs an
extra 350 PV to hit the 1,000 PV mark. So, you give them a PV/BV gift card with
350 PV and 1,000 BV.
A: How much would it cost?
Q: That's the great thing. Since there are no products
to manufacture Quixtar can offer the cards at a higher PV rate than the products.
So a 350 PV card would cost you $500.
A: Not bad, not bad at all.
Q: They probably would only be popular around birthdays
and holidays.
A: Good point. But this could be huge.
Q: So, you think it's a good idea?
A: Send the suggestion in to Jim Payne.
Q: Have you seen the new Quixtar Message Center?
A: Yep.
Q: Pretty cool huh?
A: Yep.
Q: Looks a lot like the thing on that QBlog
site doesn't it?
A: Yep.
Q: That's an interesting coincidence isn't it?
A: Yep.
Q: Well, nice chatting with you.
A: Yep.
Comments
The Mayor's Office has it on good authority, from an anonymous source, that as recently as last night, Santa Claus was seen kissing a mother of small children underneath some mistletoe.
While the source thought it would have been funny if the woman's husband had seen this kissing, the Mayor's Office does not.
You suck! The only reason you hate Quixtar is becuase you were a loser and didn't succed. You are a very big loser.
Kathleen: Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you, too!
WOW Kathleen, I bet Qblog has never heard that line before. One tip Qblog was never an IBO in the sense that he tried the business, so how could he not succeed if he didn't do it. But hey we understand, your upline never taught you to reason things out like that, otherwise you would know that they are taking you for thousands of dollars each year in tool money. They only teach you to listen to them and if anyone questions that then we are big bad losers aren't we.
Open your eyes, wake up before you are in too deep. Merry Christmas!
-Truth
http://amquixinandout.blogspot.com
Love the gift card suggestion. Why haven't they done that before ? Because Quixbots would only use that money for their own PVs anyway ?
Santa is real, real enough not to be quixtard.
Kathleen's top 5 reading priorities for 2006:
1. How to win friends and influence people - Carnegie
2. The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking - Carnegie
3. Skill with people - Giblin (make sure to get a legitimate copy from a bookstore, not the illegal reprint from the upline)
4. How to Talk Well - Bender
5. 10 Days to More Confident Public Speaking - Laskowski
OK, I need to know. Kathleen, what kind of success have you enjoyed that makes our decision to quit such a poor one?
It's not so much about hating quixtar but when they are teaching young people to skip college, telling people to skip mortgage payments to attend functions, etc etc etc, it's time for someone to inform prospects of what's in store for them if they sign up.
Sure I know the debate with the pro-q folks will turn to things like "tools are optional". They also tell you meetings are optional.
In the same breath your upline will tell you that you wouldn't buy a new car and then not put gas in it right?
"Q: They probably would only be popular around birthdays and holidays.
A: Good point. But this could be huge."
Gi-huge-ic!
PW
Posted by: PW | December 23, 2005 5:52 PM