« Not The First | Main | Sales Goal missed by 98.9% »

July 29, 2005

QBlog's Farcical Help Desk - 31

By QBlog in Farcical Help Desk

Every Friday, the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™ answers the Quixtar questions that nobody dared to ask. Additionally, each Help Desk answer is guaranteed to end with some form of punctuation or we'll refund your money. No fooling!


Question: Hey, did you hear about that new multi-blogging software that posts stuff to thousands of blogs?
Answer: I'm not sure. What's it called?

Q: It's called Blog-Mothra and it's supposed to revolutionize the way you blog.
A: Interesting. So it could help people with their Quixtar business then?

Q: Absolutely. It allows you to customize your message to thousands of people with a fraction of the effort it would have taken to do it manually.
A: How much does it cost?

Q: Not much really. See, the great thing is that you make money from it. Each blog has Google Ads and when someone clicks them, you get paid. The more blogs you have, the more you get paid! It's that easy.
A: I dunno. It sounds a lot like spam.

Q: It's not spam you asshole. How dare you suggest such a thing. It's insulting.
A: I didn't suggest anything. I just stated the obvious. If you had a white Volkswagen beetle with the number 53 painted on it, would it be insulting if I said it looks sort of like Herbie the Love Bug?

Q: Yes, it would be insulting because it's clearly not Herbie the Love Bug.
A: Right. Well ok then. I'll check out Blog-Mothra and see what it's all about.

Q: Great. Just know that if you share your opinion about Blog-Mothra, that opinion better be positive or else.
A: Will do chief.


 

Q: Hey, did you hear about that new many-blogging application that publishes content to thousands of blogs?
A: I don't think so. What's it called?

Q: It's called Blog-Ghidrah and it's designed to change the way you blog.
A: Neat. So it could help people with their Avon business then?

Q: Absolutely. It allows you to customize your message to thousands of people with a fraction of the effort it would have taken to do it without Blog-Ghidrah.
A: What's the price?

Q: Not a lot. You see, the wonderful thing is that you earn cash from it. Each blog has Yahoo Ads and when someone clicks them, you get paid. The more blogs you have, the more cash you get! It's that simple.
A: I dunno. It sounds a lot like spam.

Q: It's not spam you punk. How dare you suggest such a thing. It's insulting.
A: I didn't suggest anything. I just stated the obvious. If you had a red 1969 Dodge Charger with a rebel battle flag painted on the top, would it be insulting if I said it looks sort of like the General Lee from Dukes of Hazard?

Q: Yes, it would be insulting because it's clearly not the General Lee.
A: Right. Well ok then. I'll check out Blog-Ghidrah and see what it's all about.

Q: Great. Just know that if you share your opinion about Blog-Ghidrah, that opinion should be positive or else.
A: Will do captain.


 

Q: Hey, did you hear about that new lotta-blogging application that publishes content to thousands of blogs?
A: I don't think so. What's it called?

Q: It's called Blog-Megalon and it's created to change the way you blog.
A: Keen. So it could assist people with their Passport business then?

Q: Definitely. It enables you to customize your posts to thousands of people with a fraction of the effort it would have taken to do it without Blog-Megalon.
A: What's the price?

Q: The cost is tiny. See, the cool thing is that you earn dollars from it. Each blog has Quigo Ads and when someone clicks them, you get dollars. The more blogs you have, the more dollars you get! Isn't that fun?
A: I dunno. It sounds a lot like spam.

Q: It's not spam you dork. How dare you suggest such a thing. It's insulting.
A: I didn't suggest anything. I just stated the obvious. If you had a black Trans Am with a glowing red light in the grill, would it be insulting if I said it looks sort of like KITT?

Q: Yes, it would be insulting because it's clearly not KITT.
A: Right. Well ok then. I'll check out Blog-Megalon and see what it's all about.

Q: Great. Just know that if you share your opinion about Blog-Megalon, that opinion should be glowing or else.
A: Will do boss.

Comments (15) TrackBack (0)

Comments  

ROFL,

Are you duplicating that thing?!?

I tell ya Qblog you definately crack me up, ROFL!

Bravo!

LOL...excellent!!

This needs to go in your "classics" section!!

Darn... I was hoping for Blog-Jet-Jaguar -

-or at least Blog-Gigan!

Freaking Brilliant.

LOL! a loyal customer of blog-zilla. And look, each one is 25% different!

That got me laughing out loud here at work...I almost spit out my coffee

Hey have you guys heard of Mecha-Blog ??

On a serious note, please sign this petition

http://quixtarsucks.blogspot.com/2005/07/stop-blog-zilla-petition.html

And here's an idea. Start Stop Quixtar petition, or find an existing one and sign it.

COMING THIS SUMMER!

Blog-Zilla is trampling the streets of Blog Town. Content is everywhere. And 65% of it is truly unique and destructive. What will happen to the good citizens of Blog Town?

From the jungles of the South, one creature stands in the way of Blog-Zilla and the genetic blog research center, The Hollings Institute.

See the citizens cheer!
See buildings destroyed!
See explosions!

See THE INCREDIBLE Q-KONG wrestle Blog-Zilla!

You won't need an XS to stay awake for this one!

THIS FILM IS NOT YET RATED.

That was just so funny on a whole raft of different levels.

You should be a writer for The Simpsons.

ENCORE!!!ENCORE!

df> "Hey have you guys heard of Mecha-Blog ??"


Is that anything like Blog-Gonzo-Ultra?

PW

So are you going to mash up Blue Oyster Cult's Godzilla on the next podcast?


Way to go QBlog.





Post a comment

Comment notes: Some html is allowed (b, p, strong, em, ul, li, blockquote). Email addresses are not displayed. Avoid using profanity. Some comments may automatically end up in a “pending queue,” so be patient.

Vigorous discussion and opposing viewpoints are welcome, but please keep comments *on-topic* and *civil*. Comments containing flames, trolls, or personal attacks are discouraged and may be deleted. If you don't know what this means, please choose not to participate. Thanks.



Subscribe to this entry?