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February 18, 2005
QBlog's Farcical Help Desk - 13
By QBlog in Farcical Help Desk
Every Friday, the QBlog Farcical Help Desk™ answers the Quixtar questions that nobody dared to ask. Additionally, each Help Desk answer is guaranteed to end with some form of punctuation or we'll refund your money. No fooling!
Question: Did you hear the big news about the Quixtar-run Blogs?
Answer: What? That most of them suck?
Q: No, not that. Quixtar is developing its own blogging
service like Blogger.com and TypePad.
A: Really? Wow. No, I did not know about that. So how will this thing work?
Q: Well, apparently they are preparing to purchase
BlogHarbor and use that existing
technology to power their new blogging service.
A: Very interesting, what will it be called?
Q: They're naming it "Quixtar - The Official Quixtar
Diamond Commander Powered Blog Tool: Independent Business Owners Reaching
Their Dreams By Blogging." That's the beta name anyway. It will probably
be something longer when it's officially released.
A: TOQDCPBTIBORTDBB. That's an acronym I can sink my teeth into though remembering
it is a different story. Any cool features on this new blog service?
Q: Well, of course it will have RSS but strangely the
blogs won't have permalinks, comments, trackbacks or searchable archives.
A: That is sort of strange. Anything else?
Q: Yeah, the sign-up process will be all-new and improved.
Instead of registering and creating the blog online, new members will fill
out a form and an existing member will contact him in 2-3 business days to
set up a meeting at his house. At the meeting the existing member will talk
for about an hour or two about blogging, the costs and how easy it is to
start a blog. Then, after the blog is created, follow-up meetings will occur
every few weeks to explain the process of blogging again and again.
A: That sounds like a royal pain in the ass. On Blogger.com I can have a blog
running in about five minutes without having to talk to anyone. Is all that other
stuff really necessary?
Q: Oh, absolutely! We call it "High Touch Blogging"
and it distinguishes us from other, impersonal blogging services.
A: I dunno. Sounds stupid to me. How much does it cost anyway?
Q: Well, it's only $150 per month BUT you get a bonus
check so it's really not that much because it's your own blog, not someone
elses.
A: Right. Ok. Well, I'm anxious to see this new service. When does it launch?
Q: September 1, 2005!.
A: It's on the calendar.
Q: Daddy, what's a "farcical?"
A: It's just a word meaning "absurd" or something. And I'm not your daddy.
Q: What's it for?
A: To make you laugh.
Q: I'm not laughing.
A: Join the crowd.
Q: I'm scared.
A: Scared of what?
Q: The farcical.
A: Right. Ok, get lost kid. You're annoying me.
Q: I just got back from Executive Diamond Club in Hawaii
and it was awesome!!!
A: Three exclamation point eh? Sounds like it was fun.
Q: Oh my Gosh! I was blown away. You should have heard
Dexter Yager speak. He's like an orifice.
A: I think you mean oracle.
Q: Yeah, that. He is so wise and so cute too. Did you
know he's only three feet tall? It's true. He's like a little garden gnome.
I just wanted to tweak his cheeks and dress him up in a gnome
outfit.
A: You know what's weird, I heard Dex has a bit of a green thumb. You
should see his hydrangeas.
Q: And you should hear the things Dex says. He's so
funny. I bumped into him in the lobby and he said "Mxyzptlk!" What a riot.
A: If only he'd said it backwards.
Q: Huh?
A: Nevermind.
Comments
Green from counting the do (splained for the unfortunate)
BEST FHD EVER!!!!! 5 exclamation points :)
Imran lauds QBlog
Mxyzptlk....
Fantastic. Absolutley brilliant. Or as Comic Book Guy (from the Simpsons would say:)
Best. Reference. Ev-errr.
I was just waiting patiently for someone to fully appreciate that post.
DF, you can be a caustic SOB at times but you get plenty of cool points for picking that up. I watch a lot of SuperFriends on Boomerang with my son.
ROTFL... I hadn't thought about that in YEARS! Thanks for the reminder, Qblog... and hopefully we can get Dex to start going by xeD about er.. every 90 days or so. LOL LOL LOL! How about Britt going by ttirB? LOL
Boomerang rules!
How about the cool points for differentiating trip-hop from rave? I should get something for that, we are talking 100s of bpm here.....
Anyway, I hope caustic is some fancy term for "helly cool"....yeessss!
I don't think a correction was necessary when Dexter the dork was referred to as an oriface.
"You know what's weird, I heard Dex has a bit of a green thumb."
Everything about Dexter is green!
PW
Posted by: PW | February 18, 2005 3:45 PM